Understanding Grief

Grief is all the feelings and emotions inside of us when we experience the death of someone significant. Mourning is when we take the grief from the inside and express it in a safe place with safe people. Mourning is necessary for healing. 

  • Grief is unique.

    Just as people are different in many ways, the way they grieve is also different. Understand that the thoughts and feelings about the death are unique to each person. Grief does not happen in predictable and orderly stages. Allow yourself to be naturally where you are in the process.

  • Grief can be expressed differently.

    Some people mourn in more physical ways. This may include gardening, building a memorial, baking, walking, getting involved in community causes. Other people mourn by openly sharing their emotions. Both styles are productive and healthy ways to move toward healing.

  • Grief is a journey, not an event.

    Grief is not something you get over. It is a lifelong process of learning to live without the presence of the person we cared so deeply about.

  • Grief is something to move toward.

    It is often a natural response to move away from things that bring us pain. However, for healing to begin, you must fight the urge to avoid it and allow yourself to feel all those difficult feelings, knowing they lead to healing.

  • Tears are not a sign of weakness.

    Crying is nature's way of releasing internal tension in your body and allows you to communicate a need to be comforted. Your capacity to share tears indicates your willingness to do the work of mourning.

  • Grief takes time and energy.

    Be good to yourself. Take care of yourself and remember there is no timeline --you are on your own journey towards healing.